Bad Draft or Bad Writing Day?

The last time I sat down to work on my novel, the words read pale and lifeless. I’m only on chapter two. This can’t be a good sign.

I wrote a lot last week,on other pieces. My brain was too tired to rework any more stories. I decided I needed a break from writing, a chance to refuel. I dove into a book about writing instead: Natalie Goldberg’s Writing Down the Bones.

I’ve read bits and pieces of her book before, but this time one passage struck me.

“If every time you sat down, you expected something great, writing would always be a great disappointment.”

My writing experience lies in short pieces: blog posts, articles under 1000 words, or short stories no more than five pages. In such a compact writing space, I easily devote time and energy to edit and re-edit a whole piece to the point of satisfaction, sometimes even pride.

Now I look at a novel and its end goal of 80,000 words or 100+ pages. Subconsciously, I expect myself to sit down and write a great second draft. When I couldn’t rework even one good chapter the other day, I did feel disappointed. And, discouraged.

Time is of the essence, I thought, this story is going to get old, and fast.

If I want to rush through a re-write just to get the story out, before it becomes a bore (before I lose my confidence), maybe the story should be shelved for a while. Perhaps even for good.

How do you know when the masterpiece you poured onto paper isn’t such a masterpiece after all? Sure, elements of the story show promise, but the story as a whole reads average, not great. And, how do you know the diffference between a weak premise and a bad writing day?

***

Natalie Goldberg, Writing Down the Bones (Boston, MA: Shambhala Publications, Inc, 1986), p. 11.

Quiet Activism

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Today is Blog Action Day, when over 7,000 bloggers unite to post on one single topic: Climate Change.

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When Jessica Atcheson put out a call on SheWrites.com for fellow bloggers to participate in Blog Action Day, I’m not sure what drove me to sign up. I’m a cynic about most things political. I skirt TV campaign ads during critical races. I shy away from protests. I rarely sign petitions. Really, I am not an activist. Still, I clicked, I registered my blog, and I committed. Then, I thought, what do I know about climate change?

I wrote several drafts of a post and tried to come up with one grand idea that would mark the greatest effect on climate change. But, the same thought returned again and again: I am just one person. What effect can I possibly have on such a big issue? Then, I read an article in the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel* about efforts to reseed wild rice beds in northern Wisconsin, and it struck me. I can be an activist even if I don’t pump a protest sign or throw my voice through a bull horn. I can stay on the grid, keep my car, and still affect change little by little.

In the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel, Meg Jones reports that the Wisconsin Indian Wildlife Commission, Department of Natural Resources, various tribes and private individuals formed an alliance around 15 years ago. The group embarked on a mission to reseed old wild rice beds and restore some of Wisconsin’s natural habitats.

MJS wildrice 1 of hoffman.jpg wildriceEach year, wild rice seeds are tossed back into beds found in lakes and flowages. Some seeds rise back to the surface and are lost to the cause. But other seeds sink down into the rich, wet soil. They take root, grow, and flourish, providing food and attracting wildlife back into the area.

Reseeding is a quiet and slow process. It involves a canoe and two men. One man guides the canoe, while the other man sinks his hand into a bag, scoops out hundreds of seeds and commits them back into the water. A simple action that, in repetition, will produce a powerful effect on the climate.

I can’t afford to buy a smart car. Nor can I afford solar panels on my home or eco-toilets for my bathrooms. Still, in taking one action at a time, I can become a good steward of the environment.

Here are some ideas (and links to sites) for actions one person can take every day:

In good stewardship, one neighbor near our home refused to cut a dying tree down to its quick. Instead of erasing all evidence of the red oak tree’s existence, the homeowner transformed the remaining trunk into a visual reminder that nature’s spirit surrounds us.

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We should pay more attention and do our part to take care of her. How will you be a good steward today?
For more information on ways you can become involved, check out the Partners working with the organizers of Blog Action Day 2009.

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* Jones, Meg. “Reseeding Project Gets to Rice’s Historic Roots.” The Milwaukee Journal Sentinel 5 October 2009. Web and print.

Iron Bodies

Wordsmith.org’s theme this week is “terms from law.”

Today’s Wednesday, here’s the word:
barratry. noun: the practice of stirring up groundless lawsuits.

If you’re new to my Wednesday’s word of the day routine, know that the word is looked on as inspiration. You can use it in a story, or you can use it as a catalyst for a story. For me – today – barratry takes me back to another flash fiction post about welding and bodies and missed perceptions.

Here’s where we left off last time:

He wore his welder’s helmet. Sparks flew up and out around him. He must not have heard her walk in, but he surely felt her pointed tap on his shoulder. He jumped, dropped his torch, and swung his elbow around. In an instant, her eyebrow burned and she fell back, heard a loud clang, and blacked out.

When she opened her eyes, she looked up into flourescent lights. She blinked once, twice, and then saw him again. Only this time he wasn’t peering out from behind a green welding glass.

“You’re awake. Thank god. You scared me woman. You fell back into a pile of scrap and sliced open your head. I thought I’d killed you.” With that, he put his hand on her arm and squeezed.

Her heart popped and beat fast, and her head swirled. The heat of his hand confused her.

“Those people,” she whispered, “on the front lawn….”

He smiled. She squinted. Then, the nurse pushed open the door.

***

He left the room to give her some privacy. When he tried to go back in, the nurse side-stepped in front of him. Her words were irrelevant; it was her expression that warned him not to return. He left a note at the nurse’s desk and went back home to his welding. She stayed overnight to recover.

A few days later, she sat in her recliner watching TV. During a commercial break, she got up to pour herself another cup of tea. She walked past the TV screen and stopped short.

[Are you the victim of a personal injury? Insurance company not returning your call?]

When victim and personal hit her ears, her mind returned to the scene of the crime. She marched to the window and snapped back the curtains. He had moved the figures, sure, but she still saw evidence of their former positions in the depressed grass. She grabbed her spring jacket off the coat rack. In her frenzy to wrench it closed – tight – with the waist belt, she ignored the in-turned collar. She flung open the front door and made her way across her manicured lawn, through his overgrown yard, and straight to the garage. She heard clicking and then the sound of his torch.

This time when she pushed the door open, she held it back against the wall. She kept one hand on the door knob and one on the door itself for balance. Then, she weaved her foot around a chunk of metal and careened it her way to use as a door stop. He turned from his work and peered through his welding glass.

She waited.

He waited.

She sighed, rolled her eyes, and moved towards him. She stopped twice to make sure he put his torch down before she got too close. He raised his welding glass.

“What can I do for you?”

She couldn’t decipher the tone of his voice. “I got home from the hospital three days ago.”

“Yes.”

“You haven’t bothered to call to see if I’m okay. You haven’t said a thing about paying my bill.”

“I left a note with a nurse. Have you gotten a bill?”

“Well, no, not yet. But when I do….”

“Fine.”

Again, the tone puzzled her. “You left a note? I never got a note.”

He waited.

She waited.

He turned back to his work and pulled down his glass.

She leaned over and tapped him on the shoulder. His response was muffled by the glass, which he didn’t raise this time. He held his hands frozen in position, and she saw his shoulders rise and fall as he took a deep breath.

“I’m calling a lawyer,” she quipped.

He set down his tools. He raised his welding glass. He was smiling.

“Did you hear me?” She moved one foot back. “I said I”m calling a lawyer.”

“Yes.” His smile didn’t budge.

Her feet shuffled back and forth, and her shirt felt wet under her arms. She looked around at the other iron bodies, but their menacing looks had changed, probably from the extra light through the doorway she thought.

“You might want to cut that grass in front. It’s a hazard if we hit dry conditions.” She wanted to add insult. “Not to mention it looks like a jungle.”

“Thanks for the tip. And, you might want to fix your coat collar.” That was all he said. Not one word more.

She watched him as he turned back to his metal and lit his torch. She turned to storm out, but stopped at the door to fix her collar. Then, she reached down pushed the chunk of metal out of the way. The door closed slowly behind her.

She stood there for several minutes and listened to him work. When her eyes came back into focus, she saw speckles of color all over the back yard: purple and yellow and a soft orange. More weeds, she thought. Then, upon closer inspection, she noticed a stone path winding through the flowers.

Disgusted, she did an about face and marched back towards her house. But this time, she took the sidewalk.