Category: life

Recently, I hung out with a group of women for a few days, on retreat. There were Fall colors, belly laughs, and snacks sprawled out on a long, buffet table — salty and sweet, free for grazing at all hours of the day or night. Someone stuffed a 12-pack of Cherry Coke in the refrigerator.

“I’m in Heaven,” I said.

At home, I stock apple juice and goldfish. Cheese-its on a good day. Oh, the thrill of Cherry Coke, and of seeing the bag of mini Heath bars in the mix on the table, too…I carried a candy bar around in my pocket, just for fun, until it melted.

I didn’t just laugh and eat, though that would have been enough. I also woke up two mornings in a row, at 7am, for Yoga, if only to balance my gluttony with a little meditation. On Sunday, I drove home with a full belly, a satisfied spirit, and a quiet reminder from a sign posted just outside the main building.

At the retreat center, running alongside the building and out into the woods, is a nature trail. The trail is mostly paved, as the center also caters to people with disabilities, but one part of the trail opens up onto a grassy path not as easily accessible by wheelchairs. Just before you step off of the pavement, there’s a sign: Trail may not be suitable, it says, travel with a friend.

I’m sure whoever made that sign didn’t think of the power behind those simple words, but I did. It hints at community.

What’s funny is that in the week following the retreat, I read a few blog posts that mentioned the same idea in regards to writing or publishing: the path is difficult, but it isn’t impossible, especially if we ground ourselves in community.

Anne R. Allen says in her recent post, that “Aspiring writers…make friends with each other. We get support. We network. A lot of us talk about writing and publishing. Because, um, that’s what we have in common. . . .Friends are very important in this business.”

In Natalia Sylvester’s interview with Erika Marks, Erika talks about the importance of social media to a writer’s psyche:

I know I’m supposed to see it as an extension of the business of writing, but honestly, I can’t see it that way. The friends I have made on Twitter, other writers and readers, are truly people I’ve come to feel I know and want to check in with. I never would have imagined having that sense of genuine community through social media. I am so grateful for it and for everyone I’ve met through it. As you well know, Natalia, writing can be such an isolating endeavor. It has to be, somewhat, but I think that is the appeal of something like Twitter—that it allows for communication, even if it seems brief, it can provide some much needed interaction in the midst of so much quiet.

Travel with a friend.

Almost a year ago, I wrote a post on four reasons why writing groups were critical for my success, whether that success comes in a finished story or a published book. Those reasons still hold true, especially the last one:

…I benefit from more camaraderie and support. I could tackle this novel alone, huddled over my laptop in the cold basement of my house. But, I focus better and am more driven to finish when I’m surrounded by the warm bodies of other writers.

Pack some snacks, stock up on Cherry Coke, and whatever you do, don’t go it alone.

Where do you find your community?