Writer’s Resolutions or New Year’s Rally Cry

Here’s the thing about New Year’s resolutions: I could resolve all day long to do things like take my vitamins every day or exercise at least twice a week. In the end, I would still ignore the alarm that beeps on my phone every morning at 7am, reminding me to down the iron and calcium and what not. I would also fail to recover the pair of tennis shoes lost somewhere deep in the shadows of my closet.

Resolutions don’t work for me. But, mantras and mottos do.

When I made the decision several years ago to (seriously) pursue this whole writing idea, I did so with one phrase in my mind: Why not?

What’s the worst that could happen? I thought. I would fail? I was already failing to write by lamenting about the fact that I wanted to write stories and yet only put pen to paper in order to jot down a to-do list or scratch out an occasional journal entry. Why not just do it? Stop whining and start writing.

Why not sign up for NaNoWriMo?
Why not start a writing blog?
Why not contact that best-selling author and ask if she’d let me interview her?

In that year, I finished NaNoWriMo and got my blog rolling and off to a decent start. And that best-selling author I contacted? Beth Hoffman said yes right away and launched my author interview series. Beth has also become an author I want to emulate; she encourages emerging writers, even as she continues to receive accolades for Saving Cee Cee Honeycutt and prepares to release her next novel. Not every author holds a hand out to others. And, I might not have met this woman had I supressed my initial rally cry, Why not.

Why not gave me the initial push to pursue what I wanted, but over the holiday break, I fell into a lull. You know, that place all writers fall into, where we consider what we’ve done and try to figure out where the heck we’re headed. Then, I read a random mass email that opened with two motivating words, Fearless Writers, and it hit me. This year, I needed a new rally cry, one that would drive me to tackle goals with reckless abandon: Fearless writing.

When I say fearless writing, I don’t mean just finishing that short story or submitting that memoir piece. It isn’t only about completing the next big rewrite of my novel or finally compiling that collection of flash fiction pieces (though all of these things are part of the big picture). I say those two words with more intention. Fearless writing also means stepping out of my comfort zone, doing things that move my writing career forward in ways I want but have been afraid to pursue.

This week, fearless writing means filling out an application to work with some great writers in a position I want but am either 1) afraid I won’t get, because I’m terribly under-qualified, or 2) afraid I will get, and at which I’ll fail miserably, because I’m totally not qualified.

Fearless writing.

Nothing happens if nothing happens. I can never attain what I aim for if I never apply, if I never open the story file or write the query or send out my resume. Fearless writing means remembering that I might look down on my accomplishments (or lack thereof, if self-doubt takes over), while another person might very well see them as qualifications. Taking action, in whatever way leads me toward that thing I most want, is one way to push aside my fears. At least for the moment. And, if, in the end, nothing comes of my actions, at least I’ve had the practice of refining a story, of forming a professional email, of gathering a list of what I’ve done in the last year. Of recognizing forward progress.

What will you do as a Fearless Writer this year?

* Photo credits: “fist” from doctor_bob and “keyboard” from justcola, both on Morguefile.com

Monthly Writing Prompt: Pathways to our Past

A heavy trunk with a broken lock takes up a good part of my attic space upstairs. Inside are remnants from my past: yearbooks, a folder full of dramatic poetry from the sixth grade, letters from my best friend the year she moved to Korea. More than letters and photos, though, there are shirts and a blanket and a costume I wore in my fourth-grade talent show. My kids call it the treasure chest; a sense of excitement fills the air each time I crack the lid. They love digging through my history.

At the Wisconsin Book Festival in Madison a few weeks ago, I attended a presentation by Beverly Gordon on Cloth and Memory. She spoke about the power of textiles — from clothing, to handkerchiefs, to the blanket a child refuses to give up or (years later) a parent refuses to give away. Fabric holds memory, and “threads are pathways,” Gordon says, connecting the past to the present.

For years, a terry cloth shirt and pair of shorts has stayed buried in my trunk, has moved with me from house to apartment to house again. It’s gone the distance from Texas to Wisconsin. I wore the outfit when I was six or seven. Embroidered on the shirt is a pair of tennis rackets.

I never played tennis, but, for a short time, my parents did. My sisters and I would pile in the car with Mom and Dad on a warm Saturday and hit the courts. My father would teach my mother the art of the serve, the trick to the backhand, and my sisters and I would hit tennis balls along the backboard with badminton rackets. I wore that outfit often to those outings, and the terry cloth became my tangible reminder of those sunny afternoons: basking in the sunlight and in the sounds of my parent’s laughter. Pure bliss.

THE PROMPT

We save a favorite shirt, our mother’s scarf, our father’s hat that he wore on Sundays, because cloth connects us through time and place. Write about something of cloth that holds memory for you.

On Taking a Bye Week.

Right in the middle of the season, professional football players get a bye week. On injured reserve or not, they kick up their feet that Sunday and watch everyone else mix it up on the turf, cut across the field, get chased by antagonists. We should all be so lucky.

I’m taking a bye week, sort of. I’m not kicking my feet up, but my daughter has been on injured reserve for the past few days, in the asthmatic way, and needed some extra TLC. If you’re a parent, you know that multiple days with a sick kid at home means you lose track of time, you wander in circles. You eat smorgasbord for dinner, because nobody’s in the mood for a full-on dinner. And when I get loopy after walking in circles, I turn to knitting, not writing. I’m on dishcloth number three (simple and square are good for loopy). Knit, purl, knit, purl, knit knit knit.

Despite the sick and crazy, little bouts of creativity popped up here and there. One day, I settled my daughter into bed and she drew pictures while I read to her. Amazing pictures in between coughing fits: a colorful parrot, an American flag surrounded by a crowd of cheering patriots, and Ariel (from The Little Mermaid) all Picasso-style.

The next day, we baked up a batch of pumpkin bread that begged to be eaten right out of the oven. Pumpkin bread makes for a good afternoon snack, and may even be the cure-all. When I heard the little girlie singing in the shower and caught her getting all gussied up in front of the mirror, I knew she was on the mend.

The writing fairies haven’t totally ditched me either, despite my neglect of pen and paper. My flash fiction piece, “Iron Shadows,” hit the digital presses. You can read it here, in the Fall/Winter issue of Rose & Thorn Journal (Thanks to editors Kathryn Magendie and Angie Ledbetter!).

What would you do on a bye week?

* Rescue photo credit: Lazy_Lobster on Morguefile.com